31 Ways You Know You’ve Read Book 1 Too Many Times
Guaranteed to get you that delayed Hogwarts admission letter
You know you’ve read SS/PS too many times when you…
- Continually ask people if they want a Lemon Drop.
- Throw blankets over yourself and insist you’re invisble.
- Tell your hats that you don’t want to be put it Slytherin.
- Wince and grab your forehead every time you see a man wearing a turban.
- Ask snakes if they can hear you.
- Instruct your chess pieces where to move.
- Paint walnuts yellow, toss them in the air, and say you’re the youngest seeker in a century.
- choke on said Walnut, and say that you’ve caught the Snitch.
- Act genuinely surprised when you get presents for Christmas.
- Tap random bricks with an umbrella and insist you’re trying to get into Diagon Alley.
- Pay people with your version of Galleons, Sickles, and Knuts.
- Wave random sticks around, and when nothing happens, tell yourself that it just isn’t the right one.
- Tell your siblings that Hagrid will give them a pig tail.
- Call people Muggles.
- Tell random people that you know how to calm fluffy…
- …and refuse to explain.
- Say “sunshine daisies, butter mellow, turn this stupid fat rat yellow,” at every mouse you see.
- Tell your friends to beware of the troll in their bathroom.
- Expect to see your heart’s desire in a mirror.
- Feel around in your pocket for any stones while staring in said mirror.
- Set fire to the clothes of men with black hair at public sporting events.
- Look out for Firenze every time you enter a forest.
- Tell your teachers that you know about the Sorcerer’s Stone…
- …and refuse to explain.
- Have unknowingly done multiple things on this list.
- Continually talk about how evil you think Snape is.
- Remind your arch-enemy that there hasn’t been a witch or wizard who hasn’t gone bad in Slytherin.
- Check for trap doors beneath your dog.
- Ask people to address their letters to you to the “cupboard under the stairs,” or “the old house on the rock.”
- Jinx your broomstick, and pray that Hermione will show up to break Quirrell’s eye contact.
- Search every bag of jellybeans for a bogey flavored one. Tell all those who say otherwise that George swore he once found one.
Submitted by: Laura
